Saturday, 5 February 2011


Vegetarian blackpudding
Telling your Boss they look good enough to beat
Confusing people by swapping the D & W on Wine and Dine signs
Licking the flame on yer lighter
Pricking a blister
Cleaning yer windows with oxtail soup
Arguing the toss
Selling your ears on e bay
Impersonating sprouts
Tattoo-ing yer ma’s arse
Sellotaping Pea’s to your eyebrows
Spitballs on the class ceiling
Digging your own grape
Discovering Lemon
Refusing to look up
Sunday Roast Farts
Father O’Reilly
Wearing a raincoat for bed
Sausage flavoured tea
Marsh lane boot Boys
Walnut whip knobs
Unruly hares
Having a scrotum that resembles your Mrs.
Not giving two shits
Ringo’s starfish
Monobrow’s that encircle the entire head
Glaring at yer mates baby
Tea towels knitted from pubes
Staying in
Going out
Not realizing that you’ve just swallowed a rugby ball
Putting crushed peanuts under yer foreskin as a valentines surprise
Luis (and) Carroll


Buying yer bird a Gary Neville thong for Valentines Day
Comforting rubs
Soggy Ciggies
Furrowed brows
Long lost undercrackers
Mumford & sons
Sleeping with the enema
asking, “do I got your word”?
Wearing yer Ma’s belly warmers on a night out (Fellers)
Blistering yer prick
Tossing the Aga
Buying second hand Derby County Players on E bay
Taking the credit
Being earnest on facebook
Match Nazi’s
Cute couples
Dressing up as Richard bacon
Shaving your egg before boiling it
Being Bi-sectarian
Asking for truffle
Smoking crushed Polo’s
Boiling a Lance
A sneaky Double Jack out of the Kitty money
Not knowing what Sexy Rexy is
Genesis Corner
Becoming fatter than Fat Leo
Smashing it
Jamie and Louise adverts
Pot holes on yer shirt
Bursting in
Having a machete nearby

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